Good grief.....

I think I am in the anger stage of grief with this whole MS thing. I have been doing pretty good, I post on a forum of MSer's and get most of it out, and then I have this blog. Today has been rough though. I felt horrible all day, and was in bed most of the day.....then I got a call from the new neuro's office. Matt, her PA, called me about my blood work from last week. He told me my thyroid was up to 9.526 which is higher than it was before.....and that my ALT liver function is extremely high at 88 and the normal range is not supposed to be over 40. Of course I get this info on a holiday weekend, so I cannot talk to anyone (Dr.) about it. I looked back at my bloodwork from 5/21/08 and the ALT level was 23, so it was good then. I am pretty sure the Betaseron is what is causing my levels to be elevated. I just received a 3 month supply of the medicine today delivered by FedEx. I can just see that the doctor will tell me that I have to switch meds now that I have received this shipment. You cannot return it once it is shipped to you......guess I could EBay it......hahahaha

Then I ask him about the Thyroid tests that my other doc requested on the lab form, and he said it was not there. I guess they did not read the whole form and did not run the tests, and the techs even took extra blood to be sure and have enough. It was trying to as they popped one vein, stuck me in 2 other spots and could not get a vein, then finally did, and it stopped bleeding half way through, so they had to go to another spot. Finally they got enough blood.....I hate going to do blood work as it is always a pain for me. Literally! Either they do not listen as I try to warn them about my small veins, or they suck as a phlebotomist, and dig on me. Not fun!!!

Anyway, I just feel like every time I turn around there is something new going on, kinda like my body has turned against itself!! I feel pissed, ticked, angry, mad, upset, shocked, freaked, did I say mad, or angry??? What the heck is going on??????? I think I have been holding in a lot of stuff about it, as this all seems to have been going so fast and I have just been rolling with it. Today I feel like crying and screaming....but I do not want to freak anyone out. Sometimes being the strong one is not such a good thing......